Worst/best Dad jokes


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At the behest of @Liz here – and to give an outlet to those of us who can’t resist the need to have fun with puns, I hereby declare the Dad joke smackdown open...

 

Why did the can-crusher quit his job? Because it was soda-pressing

 

Come on Typeform community, do your worst…

 

 


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@James 

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@john.desborough 

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@James - that would be pretty crappy… but i like it

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@James 

 

 

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@James

 

 

Ni!!! Or should i say “ekkky ekky ekky bang boing”?

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just bring us a shubbery!! 

found those a while back.. they were awesome gag gifts… 

 

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😂 These are amazing @john.desborough 🐴

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@James - just cuz i know you are a Spockie

 

I wonder if they have a second rule??

 

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HAHAH @john.desborough that joke will live long and prosper in my house (actually it’ll be lost on my family. They probably think Star Trek is Elon Musk’s new brand of space trainers)

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The verdict is in for the top “funnies” at this year’s Edinburgh festival: https://www.scotsman.com/arts-and-culture/edinburgh-festivals/the-top-ten-funniest-jokes-of-the-edinburgh-fringe-2022-3814340?page=2

I think my favourite is this one, from Olaf Falafel (great name):

 

“I spent the whole morning building a time machine, so that’s four hours of my life that I’m definitely getting back”

 

@john.desborough there are some real groaners in there. I actually think you would have made the cut had you appeared at the Fringe this year.

 

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@James - the last time i was at the Fringe it was 2011.. it was a great time.. though the drive from Brighton to Edinburgh in a Mercedes people mover (with a horn that sounded like the Queen Mary’s) was a tad long .. the drive back was in a smaller car so was much nicer.. 

that festival is tremendous - i thoroughly enjoyed the comics i saw then.. 

these ‘groaners’ are fab! i think i may just have to leverage them from time to time.. lol

 

cheers mate

 

des

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@James  - this one’s for you… though i am the one that gets the ‘Dear John’ letters.. 

 

I got a letter the other day without a return address on it. I assumed it was from the Philippines...

It was in a Manila envelope.

 

 

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@James - seems we let this one get a little stale.. 

 

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@john.desborough If only I was good at dad jokes! Mine are horrible, as in, I don’t have any at all. 😅

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@James - seems we let this one get a little stale.. 

 

Haha. Yeah, you’re right @john.desborough , standards have slipped significantly. Actually I do have a lot of jokes about pizza but they are all too cheesy.

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Fun fact: you can distinguish an alligator from a crocodile by paying attention to whether the animal sees you later or in a while 🐊

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it’s monday.. you can thank me later lol

des

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Oh dear @john.desborough 🤣🙈

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🤦Just because of that @john.desborough ...

 

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@James 

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and if @James is still doing drive-about.. here’s one for the road… 

 

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